decision-making

Decision-Making8 min read

“Our life is the sum total of all the decisions we make every day, and those decisions are determined by our priorities” – Myles Munroe

A long time before there was a king in the land, there was a famine that made a man take those who belonged to his family and left. He went with his wife and their two sons to live in another country for a while.

While they were living there, the man died, and his wife was left with their two sons who got married to women from the same country they travelled to.

Ten years later, the two sons also passed and she was left all alone, without a husband or sons except for her two daughters-in-law.

Sometime later she heard that God had blessed His people by giving them a good harvest in the same land where there was famine; so she got ready to leave the country with her daughters-in-law.

They started out together to go back, but on the way, she said to them, “Go back home and stay with your mothers. May the LORD be as good to you as you have been to me and to those who have died. And may the LORD make it possible for each of you to marry again and have a home.”

So the first one kissed them goodbye. But they started crying and said to her, “No! We will go with you to your people.” “You must go back, my daughters,” She answered. “Why do you want to come with me? Do you think I could have sons again for you to marry? Go back home, for I am too old to get married again. Even if I THOUGHT there was still HOPE, and so got married tonight and had sons, would you wait until they had grown up? Would this keep you from marrying someone else? No, my daughters, you know that’s IMPOSSIBLE. The LORD has turned against me, and I feel very sorry for you.”

Again, they started crying. Then the first kissed her mother-in-law goodbye and went back home, but the second held on to her. So her mother-in-law said to her, “Your sister-in-law has gone back to her people and to her god. Go back home with her.”

But she answered, “Don’t ask me to leave you! Let me go with you. Wherever you go, I will go; wherever you live, I will live. Your people will be my people, and your God will be my God. Wherever you die, I will die, and that is where I will be buried. May the LORD ‘s worst punishment come upon me if I let anything but death separate me from you!”

She said nothing more when she saw that her daughter-in-law was determined to go with her. They travelled until they came to the country where she left with her husband and two sons.

This, then, was how Naomi came back from Moab with Ruth, her daughter-in-law. The barley harvest was just beginning when they arrived the place of their humble beginning.

[Original story found in Ruth 1:1‭-‬22]

decision-making

THE CROSSROADS OF DECISION-MAKING

…all three sobbing and weeping together in arms and soaking each other with tears… These three women were:

  • Orpah (First daughter-in-law who returned)
  • Naomi (Mother-in-law)
  • Ruth (Second daughter-in-law who persisted)

Read also Tears.


3 PERSPECTIVES AT THE CROSSROADS OF DECISION-MAKING

WHERE YOU’VE BEEN, WHERE YOU ARE, AND WHERE YOU WANT TO BE…

ORPAH

Where She’s Been

She’s been bitter and pained. She has been a widow and a daughter-in-law of a widow. She has been uncomfortable with her condition.

Where She Is

She is at a crossroad of decision-making. She’s dissuaded and is not as determined in her decision-making.

Where She is Going/Wants to Be

She wants to cut her losses, forget what reminds her of her loss, and go back to what she believes will work for her. Dissuaded/persuaded by Naomi, her mother-in-law, to go back.

She went back home to her comfort zone after being dissuaded.

NAOMI

Where She’s Been

She’s been taken away from her comfort zone to an unknown country where she lost everything she loved. Bore the latter responsibilities of her husband’s decision of leaving their country.

Where She Is

She is at a crossroad of decision-making which will decide if her future will more bitter or better. Naomi is about losing everything and cutting her loses to start afresh.

Where She is Going/Wants to Be

Naomi wants to go back to where and what works for her. She wants a new life and she is not afraid to go back to a humble beginning.

RUTH

Where She’s Been

Ruth’s been through trying times as a widow with a widow. She hung around even when it seemed hopeless.

Where She Is

She is determined to make a life-changing decision and cling on to the consequences at the crossroad.

Where She is Going/Wants to Be

She wants to leave her comfort zone and go for a new life beyond what she is used to and refuses to be deterred. Ruth is determined to make a deliberate change.

Life Lessons from Orpah, Naomi, and Ruth’s Decision-Making

Like Naomi, when you’ve had enough you’ll move from being bitter to better decision-making. It’s ok to cry and mourn but move on as soon as possible. There are some decisions you may not be able to take until some people leave your life. And when they do be willing to cut your losses and start all over again. Some decisions you will make will also affect the decisions of others.

Just like Orpah, some get dissuaded and change their minds. But at times it is also a good thing to start anew with what you know and believe even if you’re alone. And you don’t have to let so many things you don’t like happen before you move away. The road of convenience may lead you back to where you started.

And uniquely like Ruth, don’t be afraid in your decision-making. Determine to go for what you want. Stick with it if you believe it will work for you. There are things that may not happen until you dare to risk leaving that ‘familiar place.’ Be willing to adapt to changes and start again. Her determination to decide change was her ticket to a better life.

Where have you been? Where are you now? And where do you want to get to? Are you there yet?

“…But it shall come about when you become restless, That you will break his yoke from your neck.” – Genesis 27:40

How far have you come? Are you okay with the status quo? Are you willing to lose sight of familiar shores?


Read also Maiden Voyage.


Whatever thing you’re going through right now that you dislike, it’s just for a while. You are responsible for the outcome of the decision you make/follow and can be in the worse of situations and God is still there. You can make a heaven out of hell!

Never wallow in pity and think or feel like God has forgotten about you. You may not have led yourself to where you are but you can leave there if you don’t like it. Don’t leave life to chance(s). Make life happen by breaking any yoke holding you back.

Let the past be the past and decide to let go every bitterness and course your way back to strength. Don’t be afraid to start afresh where others and even you have failed.

When you know what you want and you are resolute nothing can stop you. Not even when the people you look up to tell you otherwise with their suggestions and opinions. They may mean good from their perspective and experience but because it was bad for them or they couldn’t do it doesn’t mean you won’t succeed. You know what you want. It could even be a test… Have a strong WHY to keep you holding on.

It is always easier to go back to the familiar but charting a new course pays more dividend.

The best things come from unlikely places. We may not know but it’s all connected. (Ruth became the great-grandmother of King David. And this is the lineage Jesus came from.)

The bitter experiences you’ve passed through may not count as strength until you encounter what they’ve prepared you for. In your helplessness, you truly understand your true strengths and weaknesses. Then, you’re ready to connect to the source.

Don’t quit because everything familiar is no more. Your story continues when you don’t quit.

Mourn but get over bitterness. Don’t look so long at what you’ve lost that you don’t see what you’ve got left.

Time and space are the things that limit our physical senses. We can always start again.

IN YOUR DECISION-MAKING…

Cut your losses and count your blessings.

Understand that the decisions you make do not only affect you but also the people around you and the future. Your life as a bunch of decisions has an impact on other people. Indecision is also a decision on its own – a decision not to decide. Take responsibility for your decisions.

Determine to go ahead with what you believe as it is what you believe in that will work for you. Let the determination for a good life lead you to make quality choices. Choose to sprout through the hard and trying times against all odds. Live deliberately and decisively. Finish every started project.

Because in the end, only you can change your life with your decision-making.

So, how much do you want it? Are you determined enough to make good decisions you won’t go back on? It doesn’t matter where you’ve been. It doesn’t matter where you are. What matters most is where you want to be/go and the decision and determination to go for the life you deserve.

This is the moment when it has to be this or that! Decide…


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